Make a Promise to be Present

As this interesting and somewhat trying year comes to a close, I have spent some time thinking about what I can do to improve upon myself, not just in the coming new year, but also right now. How I can end the year as a better version of myself than I started it as. And while that task seems like something that could be easy...it has lead me through a great deal of thought. Because naturally, when I first began to brainstorm ideas for self improvement I was mainly focused on my physical body--something I struggle often with accepting. I would finally learn to contour my face! Or perhaps I would get hair extensions, or vitamins to make my hair grow faster. Or maybe I would work out more and get rid of my 'pudgy' stomach! That would make me a better version of myself. That was quickly thwarted though, by the fact that I've got a broken foot and haven't been able to work out for about three weeks now. The problem with all of these things, though, is that they are not improving me rather than they are improving my physical appearance. But I am more than the flesh and bones that make up this house my soul dwells in. And I want to make improvements that go beyond the surface. So I went back to the drawing board and I continued to think. And that is when I discovered the first promise I will make to myself. 

The promise to be present.

If life is about building relationships, with others, with yourself, with the world around you and with whatever higher being(s) you may believe in (which I believe that it, in large part, most definitely is), then that would stand to reason that it would follow one of the Golden Rules of relationships, if you will. And that is that you must be present. You must show up. Not your shell, your physical body while your mind is somewhere else, but you.

And there are countless reasons why people often don't show up. There are a number of reasons why I have not shown up in the past. I'm distracted, stuck in my own head. Or I'm excited about something that is to come in the future, already making plans and arrangements. Or, perhaps I'm letting myself be consumed by worries and anxieties that aren't particularly relevant to the place I am occupying in the current moment in time. Or there can be even deeper issues at play. The cliche, dramatic movie scene type of absence, where it zooms in on the character's face and devolves into a flash back of some moment in the past that they're stuck on, either something terrible they fail to get over, or something beautiful that they can't move on from. Or maybe they're stuck waiting for their cue, for their life or their happiness to begin. This is a big one that I'm guilty of. I'll catch myself saying to me, "Once I get X, I'll be happy." Once I get a flatter stomach, longer hair. A better apartment. Etc. 

The problem with this is that you're not truly living your life. You're not showing up to events that are happening in your own life. You have to show up and be present each and every day, and it requires attention and honesty. I understand that, that sounds like a lot of work, to give everything we are to the moment we're in, but I do believe it has so many benefits. In the moments where we're truly present rather than just going through the motions, life is rich and vivid rather than dulled out. 

This is why I have made it a promise to myself that I will make it a conscious effort to be present in each moment of my life. Each event that happens around me, each person I interact with, will have the fullest version of myself. And I urge each and every one of you to consider making the same promises to yourselves as well.

Godspeed, friends.